Then there are the chickens. This spring you may have read that Stan and Lexie brought home 4 baby chicks. Stripes, Chicken Little, Blackie and Little Red. The knowledgeable salesman at IFA assured us that we would have 4 little hens laying eggs in 6 months and that all but stripes layed brown eggs. Stripes would lay what they call "Easter Eggs" because they would be green. Now I trust this man, LeRoy, knowledgeable IFA salesclerk. I have to because my friends...I am clueless.
Before my gig as Farm Wife, I was a different kind of "Chick-in-Charge. An Executive Assistant. I hired and fired. I shopped at high end stores (even if it was for my boss), I now shop at Cal-Ranch and Intermountain Farmers Association instead. Back then I made reservations at fancy restaurants. Now I make reservations with the farmer down the block for bales of hay for the winter and run my farm errands in a 1948 Ford Tractor and a Dodge Pick-up. I used to place orders with the travel agent for flights to International Destinations all over the world. I now say things in IFA that sound like some foreign language or secret code. "I'll take 2 Gold Horse Conditioner, 1 Laying Mash and 1 Laying Pellet and where and what is DCE? to which LeRoy says "Oh, Dichloroethene, it's on isle 7 an keeps yer chickens from havin' ticks n such"...and he kindly tosses it all into the back of my truck with a "Air ya R Maam...Have a Nice Day".
Before becoming a Farm wife, I didn't know what any of that was(especially DCE). My dress code used to include Ann Taylor shirts and black "power suits" and stiletto heels . Now, my dress code includes Carhart coats, Wrangler Jeans, rubber manure boots and Pigskin work gloves. (I still get to experience that "new-leather-smell" but it's not from the bosses new luxury car on the way to the car wash, it's just from the Pigskin Gloves as I wear them on my way to the barn.) But I digress...back to the barnyard...
So August comes and we have our 1st egg!!! Oh the excitement to see that brown beauty. We are only getting one egg every few days, and they are always brown, so I begin to pay special attention to Stripes. Yes, I know that we were told we had 4 hens but Stripes has a longer neck and lots more fluffy feathers. I question my husband who is an old time farmer and knows all about these things. He tells me that Roosters have bigger "combs" (the big red floppy thing on top for those non-farm-educated like me). Stripes comb was the smallest of all 4 chickens so with that I am reassured. Then a few weeks later, I notice tail feathers, long beautiful green ones...on Stripes. Then noises, early morning noises. Could Stripes be a Rooster? No, my farm husband assures me, Stripes is just answering to the neighbors Roosters. Then it happened...Lexie comes in and says "What is Stripes doing to Chicken Little? OH, it IS a Rooster my dear husband says. What about the comb? I guess Stripes has a little "comb-envy" and it's not size that matters (at least with chicken combs). How is it that I am the only one who picked up on the male vibe, comb-or not, Stripes is indeed a Rooster. Well, after a few mornings of his alarm ER-ER-ER-ER-ERRRRRRR going off before my regular alarm clock, it was time for Stripes departure.
I keep thinking, the reason we are doing this whole chicken thing is to have eggs right? So I'm cruising KSL.com for a replacement hen and there she is. In the same town we live in, a new Leghorn (the big white regular looking ones that lay white eggs)who is already laying for $5.00!!! So I surprise my family with Gretta Egg'nlayer.
Now Gretta Egg'nlayer comes from a large flock of hens who have never been played with and have never been caught. She's a strong-willed German girl who knows who is the boss and isn't afraid to remind you that it's HER! In our flock, the Chick-in-Charge has always been Chicken Little. Our flock have all been handled and loved since they were chicks. When we go out to feed, Chicken Little flies up on top of the hen house as if to say "Hi...Whatcha doin?" and expects you to visit and pet her a little before you steal the egg she has so graciously laid for you. I also notice that Chicken Little is the only hen who sits in the 1st of the laying boxes in the Hen house. That box is also the only place we find eggs.
So I introduce Gretta to the flock. There are big noises exchanged between Gretta and Chicken Little. Houston...we have a problem... Have you heard the term "too many Chiefs and not enough Indians"??? What happens when you have 2 Alpha Chicks. I tried separating them but within minutes of being together, the bickering started. The term "Hen Pecked" has a whole new meaning after you have seen an actual hen pecking. They are mean. Viscous. As Scooby Doo says...Rah Roh Raggy...what have I done! None of them are going to lay eggs if there is this much fighting going on.
Next morning, no such luck. After several trips out to check on the chickens, I see that Gretta and Chicken Little still have ruffled each others feathers and fight to see who will win. However, now I see that Chicken Little has Blackie and Little Red on her side and it's 3 against one. They have Gretta cornered and she flies on top of a tree branch trying to fly over the chicken wire to freedom. I knocked her off but she just kept trying to get over the fence. This evening, I went out to find Gretta perched atop the chicken wire and again, all 3 of the other hens "egging" her on to run away and this time when I shake the fence, it knocks her OVER the fence and into the neighbors yard. Lexie and I ran and chased Gretta until all 3 of us were worn out. That stubborn Gretta crawled between the hog wire and chicken wire that makes up their round corral. I was able to grab her and work her way to the top and pull her out. I brought her in the house and Stan quickly clipped her wings so she wouldn't be able to fly over the fence any more. As I put a rather deflated Gretta back in the corral she walked into the hen house and layed in the last laying box, resigning her Chick-In-Charge position to Chicken Little.
Now I realize that this is a rather long post but it got me thinking. In life, who are your Gretta's. Who are your Chicken Little's and who are your Blackie and Little Reds? Who has to be the boss, be right, or be controlling at any cost. Who purposely creates contention in your hen house? What loyal friend has your back when faced with a hen-pecking opponent? Who has clipped your wings in order to protect you from hurting yourself. The lessons learned on the farm rarely only apply to animals. As I watch their behavior, it has taught me so much about my own life and how much I get in my own way. I also realize that I am quite enjoying not being the Chick-in-Charge. What I receive from releasing my need to control is hard to put into words but is changing my life for the better. Just like all my life teachers, 2 & 4 legged... They have taught me over the years. "Control is an illusion" "Let go and let God". "Faith and Fear cannot exist in the same place". It's easier said than done but a lesson that keeps teaching me just the same. We are all tucked in here at the Garden of Eggen and all of our prayers are the same...for peace and to never take anything for granted...(you may be chicken dinner if you don't behave!!!)
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